Hey it's been less than a year!

Is that progress? Ha. I don't know that we can call it much progress.

This year has been busy. We purchased a travel trailer and have taken it out a few times. It's fun and we have enjoyed it they times we have been able to get away. A couple weeks ago we had Alison's birthday party. We had it at our house (1st kid bday party at the house) it was a luau and it turned out really cute. Becky came down and helped for a week and did most of the party stuff for us. I'm super thankful she was here because I wasn't up to hosting a party. Ivy, Jeff & the kiddos made it down for the party as well. It's really so perfect when I get all besties and their kiddos to come from near and far.

A couple weeks prior to Alison's birthday my Aunt Margaret passed away. She had been suffering from dementia for a while and wasn't well. I'm at ease that she is no longer suffering and is back with her husband. I'll hold tight to the memories that I have from my childhood - she was always just so sweet. I was lucky enough to get a photo of her and both my kiddos last year when we were up there visiting. I'm very glad we took a second to take a photo.

Unfortunately, Sharon fell and broke her hip in February. We could no longer care for her in our home and she is not recovering well. We had to place her in long term care so she is up in St George. She's not doing very well. But she is being taken care of and we go up and visit once a week. Alison looks forward to going to see Grandma at the doctors. Chad's family friend goes to visit her as well which is nice too. My parents visit her when they are up there for Dr appointments as well.

Jadon is finishing up summer school. He has learned so much in these few weeks! Mr Abbott is his teacher for summer school which is super cool. He has really come so far and is able to read the little books he brings home. It's really cool to see him learning and growing every day. Alison is finally potty trained so we have enrolled her in pre-school it starts in the fall and is only an hour and a half twice a week. But, she is really excited about it. Jadon has taught her a lot. She's a smart little shit.

Chad has been awesome as always as keeping up with everything and keeping our household going. I haven't felt well in a few months. I've gone to the Dr a few times and have a couple more appointments coming up. I just don't know what to do anymore. It's really tiring to feel like crap all the time. I felt pretty good for a couple days - which was awesome, but also pretty depressing. It opened my eyes to how far my life has slipped. I don't interact with the kids as much, I don't participate in our marriage as much. Chad feels so distant and I seem to be a burden rather than a partner. I hate it. Our house is pretty much a mess all the time. I can't keep it up. Hell, I can't keep myself up. One of the days I felt well I looked at myself in the mirror and I can literally see the toll my body is taking. I haven't worked out in a long, long time. I don't have energy for that. It's hard to even make it through work. Last week was the first week in I dont even know how long that I came in every day and didnt leave early (and it was only 4 day week cuz of the holiday). Chad pointed out I drive differently now, something I had noticed a couple months ago and was just kind of hoping he wouldn't take notice to. Being sick really sucks. I miss being healthy, I miss my life. I feel like my family is getting ripped off by having to deal with me instead of having a healthy, happy me.

Ok... that's enough blah blah for now...

Love you all!
D